The Silver Linings Playbook Chapter 27

As If He Were Yoda and I Were Luke Skywalker upbringing on the Dagobah SystemWhen we finish discussing our Kubb tournament victory and Mrs. Patels extraordinary skill to render an exact likeness of Brian Dawkinss good dealt on the hood of a school mound, I pick the black recliner and furcate drib I am a olive-sized depressed.Whats molest? he says, dis say the lever and raising his footrest.Terrell Owens. free f whole nods, as if he were expecting me to bring up the wide receivers name.I did not necessitate to talk roughly this earlier, further it was reported that Terrell Owens (or T.O.) tried to kill himself on September 26. News reports utter that T.O. overdosed on a pain medication. Later, after T.O. was released from the hospital, he said he did not try to kill himself, and consequently e actuallyone began to think he was crazy.I recommend T.O. as a young 49er, tho Owens was not on the 49ers roster when I watched the Eagles play in San Francisco a few weeks ago. W hat I learned from studying the sports pages was that T.O. had played for the Eagles when I was in the fearful place, and he had helped the Birds get to Super Bowl XXXIX, which I do not remember at all. (Maybe this is good, since the Eagles lost, b arly not remembering still makes me palpate crazy.) T.O. on the face of it held push through for more money the next year, said noisome things to the highest degree Eagles QB Donovan McNabb, was suspended for the second half of the season, and then was actually cut from the team, so he signed with the very team Eagles fans hate most the Cowboys. And because of this, everyone in Philadelphia currently hates T.O. more than just around anyone else on the planet.T.O.? Dont worry astir(predicate) him, drib says. Dawkins is breathing out to hit him so hard that Owens will be afraid to catch any balls at the Linc.Im not worried ab by T.O. making catches and scoring touchdowns.Cliff brasss at me for a second, as if he does not hunc h forward how to respond, and then says, Tell me what worries you.My fatnessher refers to T.O. as a psychopathic pill popper. And on the phone this week, Jake also made jokes about T.O. taking pills, calling Owens a nutter. wherefore does this bother you?Well, the reports I read in the sports pages claimed that T.O. was possibly battling depression.Yes.Well, I say, that would suggest peradventure he demand therapy.And?If Terrell Owens is real depressed or mentally unstable, why do the concourse I love use it as an excuse to talk ill about him?Cliff takes a deep breath. Hmmm.Doesnt my dad understand that Im a psychopathic pill popper too?As your therapist, I can brook that you be clearly not psychopathic, Pat. nevertheless Im on all sorts of pills.And exclusively you atomic number 18 not a managering your medications.I can plan what Cliff means, but he doesnt really understand how I feel which is a shuffle of very complicated and hard-to-convey emotions, I realize so I stump the subject.When the Dallas Cowboys come to Philadelphia, the fat mens tent and the Asiatic Invasion bus ar combined to create a super party that again features a Kubb tournament on Astroturf, satellite television, Indian kabobs, and much beer. But I cannot concentrate on the fun, because all around me is abhorrence.The basic things I notice are the homemade T-shirts other tailgaters are buying and interchange and habiliment. So many different slogans and images. One has a cartoon of a small boy urinating on the Dallas star, and the furnish reads dallas sucks. t.o. swallows pills. Another shirt has a large prescription bottleful with the universal skull-and-crossbones poison symbol on the label and terrell owens written underneath. Yet another version features the pill bottle on the front and a gun on the back, under which the caption reads T.O., if at first you dont succeed, buy a gun. A nearby tailgater has nailed T.O.s mature Eagles jersey to a ten-foot cross, w hich is also covered with orange prescription bottles that consider exactly like mine. People are burning their old T.O. jerseys in the parking lot human-size dolls in T.O. jerseys are strung up so people can hit them with bats. And til now though I do not like any Dallas Cowboy, I feel sort of bad for Terrell Owens because maybe he really is a sad guy who is having apprehension with his mind. Who knows, maybe he really did try to kill himself? And yet everyone mocks him, as if his mental health is a joke or maybe they necessity to push him over the edge and would like nothing more than to see T.O. dead.Because of my poor throws, Cliff and I get knocked out of the Kubb tournament early, losing the cinque bucks my brother fronted me, and this is when Cliff gets me to help him move some India Pale Ale out of the Asian Invasion bus. When we are inside of the bus, he closes the door and says, Whats wrong?Nothing, I say.You werent even looking to see where your batons landed, you were so distracted during the Kubb halts.I say nothing.Whats wrong? Youre not in your leather seat.Cliff sits down, pats the bus seat, and says, Pleather will have to do today.I sit down in the seat across from Cliff and say, I just feel bad for T.O. Thats all.Hes getting millions of dollars to endure this type of criticism. And he thrives on it. He brings it on himself with those touchdown dances and the hoopla. And these people dont really want T.O. to die they just dont want him to serve well today. Its all in good fun.Now, I know what Cliff means, but it doesnt seem like good fun to me. And regardless of whether T.O. is a millionaire or not, Im not authentic T-shirts encouraging anyone to shoot himself in the passing game should be condoned by my therapist. But I dont say anything.Back out-of-door the bus I see that Jake and Ashwini are in the final game of the Kubb tournament, so I try to cheer for them and block out the hatred that surrounds me.Inside the Linc, all through out the first half, the crowd sings, O.D. O.D., O.D., O.D. O.D. O.D. Jake explains that the crowd use to sing, T.O. T.O., T.O., T.O. T.O. T.O. back when Owens was an Eagle. I watch Owens on the sideline, and even though he doesnt have many catches yet, he seems to be dancing to the rhythm of the crowds O.D. song, and I wonder if he is really so immune to seventy green people mocking his near overdose or if he really feels differently inside. Again I cant help feeling bad for the guy. I wonder what I would do if seventy thousand people mocked my immobilizeting the prevail few years of my life.By halftime Hank Baskett has two catches for twenty-five yards, but the Eagles are losing 21 17. every throughout the second half, Lincoln Financial stadium is alive we Eagles fans know that first place in the NFC East is at stake.With just under eight minutes to go in the third, everything changes.McNabb throws a long one down the left side of the field. Everyone in my naval divisio n stands to see what will happen. Number 84 catches the ball in Dallas territory, puts a move on the defender, takes off for the end zone, and then I am in the air. Under me are Scott and Jake. Im riding high on their shoulders. Everyone in our section is high-fiving me because Hank Baskett has finally weed his first NFL touchdown an eighty-seven-yarder and of course I am wearing my Baskett jersey. The Eagles are winning, and I am so happy that I forget all about T.O. and start to think about my dad reflection at home on his huge television, and I wonder if maybe the TV cameras caught me when I was riding high on Jakes and Scotts shoulders. Maybe pa saw a life-size me celebrating on his flat screen, and maybe he is even proud.A series of tense moments get our hearts defeat at the end of the fourth quarter, when Dallas is driving, down 31 24. A score will send the game into OT. But Lito Sheppard intercepts Bledsoe and returns the pick for a TD, and the completely stadium sing s the Eagles fight song and chants the letters, and the day is ours.When the clock ticks down, I look for T.O. and see him sprint off the field and into the locker manner without even shaking the hand of one single Eagle. I still feel bad for him.Jake and Scott and I exit the Linc and run into the Asian Invasion which is tardily to spot from far external because it consists of fifty Indian men, usually clumped together, all in Brian Dawkins jerseys. Just look for fifty number 20s, they always say. Cliff and I run up to each other and high-five and scream and yell, and then all fifty Indian men start chanting, Baskett, Baskett, Baskett And I am so happy I pick little Cliff up and hoist him onto my shoulders and carry him back to the Asian Invasion bus as if he were Yoda and I were Luke Skywalker training on the Dagobah System in the warmness section of The Empire Strikes Back, which is as I told you before one of my incomparable favorite movies. E-A-G-L-E-S EAGLES we chant so many times as we navigate the crowds and find our way back to our spot behind the Wachovia Center, where the fat men are confronting with ice-cold celebration beers. I sustentation hugging Jake and high-fiving Cliff and chest bumping the fat men and singing with the Indians. I am so happy. I am so impossibly happy.When the Asian Invasion drops me off in front of my house, its late, so I ask Ashwini not to blow the Eagles chant horn and he reluctantly agrees although when the bus rounds the corner at the end of my street, I hear fifty Indian men chant, E-A-G-L-E-S EAGLES I cant help smiling as I enter my parents home.I am ready for Dad. After such a big win a win that puts the Eagles in first place surely Dad will want to talk to me. But when I enter the family room, no one is there. No beer bottles on the floor, no dishes in the sink. In fact, the whole house looks spotless.Dad? mum? I say, but no one answers. I saw both of their cars in the ride when I came home, so I am ve ry confused. I draw to climb the steps, and the house is deadly quiet. I check my seatroom, and my beds made and the room is empty. So I knock on my parents bedroom door, but no one answers. I push the door open and immediately beseech I hadnt.Your father and I made up after the Eagles victory, Mom says with a funny smile. He aims to be a changed man.The sheet is pulled up to their necks, but somehow I know my parents are naked underneath the covers.Your boy Baskett healed the family, my father says. He was a god out there on the field today. And with the Eagles in first place, I thought, Why not make up with Jeanie?Still, I cannot emit.Pat, maybe youd like to go for a run? my mom suggests. Maybe just a little half-hour run?I close their bedroom door.While I change into a tracksuit, I think I hear my parents bed squeak, and the house seems to shake a little too. So I drop on my sneakers and run down the stairs and out the front door. I sprint across the park, run around to the back of the Websters house, and knock on Tiffanys door. When she answers, shes in some sort of nightgown and her face looks confused.Pat? What are you My parents are having sex, I explain. Right now.Her eyes widen. She smiles and then laughs. Just let me get changed, she says, and then shuts the door.We walk for hours all around Collingswood. At first I ramble on and on about T.O., Baskett, my parents, Jake, the Asian Invasion, my unify pictures, my mothers ultimatum actually working everything but Tiffany does not say anything in response. When I run out of words, we simply walk and walk and walk, and finally we are in front of the Websters house and it is time to say good night. I stick my hand out and say, Thanks for listening. When it is clear that Tiffanys not going to shake, I start to walk away.Turn around, bright eyes, Tiffany says, which is a very weird thing for her to say, because my eyes are brown and very dull, but of course I turn around. Im going to give you some thing that will confuse you, and maybe even make you mad. I dont want you to open it until you are in a very relaxed mood. Tonight is out of the question. Wait a few days, and when you are feeling happy, open this letter. She pulls a white crease envelope out of her jacket pocket and hands it to me. Put it away in your pocket, she says, and I do as I am told, more often than not because Tiffany looks so deathly serious. I will not be cart track with you until you give me your answer. I will leave you alone to think. Regardless of what you decide, you cannot tell anyone about what is inside of that envelope. Understand? If you tell anyone even your therapist Ill know by looking in your eyes, and I will never speak to you again. Its best if you simply follow my directions.My heart is pounding. What is Tiffany talking about? All I want to do is open the envelope now.You have to wait at least forty-eight hours before you open that. Make sure you are in a good mood when you read the letter. approximate about it, and then give me your answer. Remember, Pat, I can be a very valuable friend to you, but you do not want me as an enemy.I remember the story Ronnie told me about how Tiffany lost her job, and I begin to feel very afraid.